So, the radiation has stopped, but Dr. S has assured me that I will not start to improve for about a week or two. I am determined that the side effects will not interfer with my physical life. But, I need to figure out my mental state going forward.
In church I am still doing a lot of whispering - it is a great excuse not to have to sing...
When I am out in public, say at the store, I continue to do a lot of smiling.. when sales people ask how I am doing and if I need help.. I just smile and nod.
I still get a lot of laryngitist comments, and I just smile and nod. I am still a little worried that my voice won't come back, but I guess I will have to put that worry off. My voice can't really get worse at this point, since I can't make a noise above a whisper.
I am thinking about my long term future.. I don't really feel like a cancer survivor because this was such a small thing. The women in my on line support group have gone through so much and they have had and will continue life changing events due to their cancer. I am now able to imagine, even a little bit, the agony of extended chemo and radiation... just evil things to combat the cancer enemy.
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